Enos Ekka’s Incredible India!

You are seeing Jharkhand mamla on TV, no? Like in Hindi fillum, there is car chases, helicopter rides, hiding and seeking, suspense, drama.....

You are seeing Jharkhand mamla on TV, no? Like in Hindi fillum, there is car chases, helicopter rides, hiding and seeking, suspense, drama…all fillum things. Arrey baba, what to say, I am too excited only. Arjun Munda saab is now Chief Minister and, myself, Enos Ekka, am minister. See, we are ikyalees, 41, peepuls, who are with Munda saab through thickness and thinness in this mamla. But who is chief hero? Just be taking one guess. Yes, it is myself, Enos Ekka, now minister. Previously, nobody was knowing this humble MLA from Kolebira. Now the whole India is knowing my name. They are asking, ‘‘Who is Ekka?’’ Then they are asking even more, ‘‘Where is Ekka?’’ They are sending polis to finding me. TV is capturing my photo and every time everybody is wanting to know who I am supporter of.

Arrey baba, I am saying, no, that I am with Arjun Munda saab. I am telling and telling, ‘‘I am with NDA.’’ But no one is believing only. They are still asking. I am still telling. Arrey baba, this is simple mamla. See, between yourself and myself I am telling, Munda saab is more promising than Soren saab. Arrey baba, Munda saab is always promising and promising and I am trusting his promising. I am trusting because he even sent special helicopter to Kolebira for purpose of taking me to Ranchi. Arrey baba, that was too thrilling only. Whirr, whirr, hawai udaan came down from skies, just like in Hindi fillum, and then came lifting me up to the clouds like that hero fellow, Akshay Kumarji. And then he is making me minister. What he is saying he is doing.

From beginning only he was looking after us very sumptuously, with gunmen and all protecting us, chaubees ghante, 24 hours. It was like living inside Hindi fillum with myself, Enos Ekka, as Hero No 1. They are putting us into luxury bus and taking us to hawai adda. Then Stephen Marandi saab is coming to searching me. ‘‘Where is Ekka?’’ he is saying, and is himself looking under airplane chairs for me. But I am hiding in toilet, so he is not finding me. It is too thrilling. Then Munda saab is saying that we will be going by luxury Qualis and Sumo to unknown destination. I am enjoying because I am thinking, they will be taking us to new-new places. Maybe even to foreign, like Nepal and Bangladesh. So we are first going to Durgapur, then they are saying West Bengal polis will capture us. So then we are going to Chhattisgarh. Then suddenly they are saying we are going to Bubaneshwar. I am still enjoying but it is also creating tiring feeling.

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Then they are putting us on airplane to Dilli. Arrey baba, I am simple man, but they are greeting me at Delhi like I am Amitabh Bachchanji. They are garlanding me and garlanding me, and putting ladoos, gulab jamuns, barfis into my mouth. Don’t mistake. I am enjoying. But I am also liking chicken and there is no chicken in strict vegetarian Gujarat Bhavan, where we are putting up. But I am liking Rashtrapati Bhavan very much. It is big-big with big-big gates and big-big guards and big-big lights. I am doing namaskar to Rashtrapatiji, who is smiling specially at me. They are then allowing TV to be photographing us and we are seeing ourselves on TV, just like Akshay Kumar. Then I am seeing, arrey, my wife is crying on TV and saying I am disappearing. This is making me very sad but Munda saab is very-very nice. He is kindly arranging the whole of my family to be living in his friend’s house in hidden place so that TV peepul will not be talking to them.

To be telling frankly, I am liking Rajasthan trip best. Top class. Food is rich but good and sometimes chicken-mutton is also there. We are even going and wishing Vasundhara Rajeji in her garden for her birthday party and eating cake and gol-guppas. We are seeing nice-nice sightseeing, beautiful mahal and luxurious resort. It was like 5-star tour, bilkul. Vasundharaji is maharani but myself, Enos Ekka, am feeling like maharaja. In Jaipur we went shopping and I am buying dark glasses like Ravi Shastri is wearing on cricket TV, and nice-nice shirts for myself and presentation articles for my family members. I am telling, no, Arjun Munda saab is very promising?

But one small thing only I am saying. It is alright for Rajasthan ministers to be looking after us and guarding us with guards. But why did Vasundharaji tell them to be following us to barber shop and bathroom? They are taking too much trouble looking after us, so that sometimes the feeling is coming that we are chidiya in cage. This is not complaining, mind it, only observing. In toilet at least we must have private feeling, no?

Anyway, you will be watching me being minister on TV. I am too excited only. Myself, Enos Ekka, Hero No 1, Minister and your humble Aaj ka MLA.