As the poet laureate in charge of soccer chants, Jonny Hurst does not have as high a public profile as, say, Andrew Motion, the poet laureate of Britain itself.But then again, Motion has never had occasion to write a little song about a dishy Aston Villa player who comes from Colombia and wears headbands during games. Set to the tune of Copacabana, the chant begins:His name is Angel/ And he’s a show boy/An Alice band keeps up his hair/Juan Pablo from Col-om-biare.Trying to explain exactly what his job entails, Hurst — a fan of Birmingham City, Aston Villa’s sworn enemy — said, ‘‘The brief isn’t to write about what my team is doing.’’ Which is lucky, because otherwise he would surely antagonize fans of the 19 other teams in the English Premiership.Hurst is the nation’s first chant laureate, charged, he said, with ‘‘chronicling developments in the football season.’’ He makes twice as much money as the poet laureate, $19,200 for a year’s work, but their responsibilities are vaguely similar. Interviewed while on the job the other day at a match between Tottenham Hotspur and Aston Villa, Hurst said the poet laureate reacted to national events, and ‘‘I respond to footballing events.’’Traditional chants are as essential to British football. Deeply embedded in the game’s working-class, tribal roots, chants are a way of bolstering your own team, displaying toughness, cynicism and sometimes sentimentality, and mercilessly homing in on your opponents’ every weakness.Many are short, snappy and mean. Opponents of Liverpool, for instance, like to remind its supporters of the blight and misery the city suffered in the 1980s. To the tune of the team song, You’ll Never Walk Alone they chant: ‘‘You’ll never get a job.’’No one in Villa Park for the game the other day seemed aware that the chant laureate himself, in blue jeans and an oversize urban-chic parka, was in their midst. In his real life, Hurst is a short, mild-mannered partner in a commercial-property law firm. Born in Birmingham, Hurst now lives in a multi-loyalty household in London, which includes a wife who supports Chelsea and two children who support Arsenal. (A third has not yet declared a preference, being too young to talk.)He has an encyclopaedic knowledge of soccer history and takes his role as chant laureate seriously, attending soccer games, watching televised matches, listening to soccer-themed talk radio and, during the lulls, getting soccer updates via text messages on his cell phone.‘‘It’s a good excuse for my wife, because I can tell her that I’m working’’, Hurst said.Hurst recently wrote a chant commemorating Sir Alex Ferguson’s 1,000th game as manager of Manchester United. To the tune of Mrs Robinson, it begins:So here’s to you, Mr. Ferguson/You’re the greatest coach this club has ever seen (like Aberdeen).Another chant comments on the fact that three top English players are now playing for Real Madrid. To the tune of ‘‘Three Little Maids from School’’ from The Mikado” it begins:Three brittle boys in Spain are we/Each of us prone to injury.“Real” signed us all for a handsome fee;/Three brittle boys in Spain.(The New York Times)
