We hear every other person using the words inferiority complex. But it is more commonly used among the younger generation, especially the collegians and adolescents. Being a lecturer of Psychology in a renowned college and a practising psychologist, I come across many youngsters who ask me to help them overcome their problem of inferiority complex. If they would not be confiding in me by telling me about it, I would have surely mistaken them to be `suffering' from the not-so-common nowadays `superiority complex'.A youngster may develop an inferiority complex even when he scores 98 per cent marks and his friends outbeat him scoring 99 per cent (or maybe even cent percent?) and get into medical or computer engineering (the only two heavens on earth nowadays). I have come across parents of such youngsters too, developing an inferiority complex. The parents are guilty that the child has lost the remaining two per cent (probably, forgetting their good old days!) and feel like hiding their faces developing a social phobia and the cause being their child, scoring only 98 per cent marks. (Poor parents! God bless them!).Lately, I overheard a youngster telling his mom that he had developed an inferiority complex because he was the only one among his friends who drove to college in the same car everyday. His friends had at least three to four cars each, so they never repeated the car, at least for the next few days. I felt sorry on seeing the mother's guilt-ridden face. The only thing she could probably think of was promising him another car on his birthday.The so-called well-wishers, friends and relatives too get sadistic pleasures by gifting the youngster with an array of complexes like the shorty-complex, blacky-complex, specky-complex, fatty-complex, pimple-complex (which we may more loving call the papad complex). The depressive youngster tries hard battling with all the old and new remedies saving himself from permanently being labelled as `fried papad'. The ones with a superiority complex (hats off to them!) spare no one.It's a pity that our youngsters look down upon the students who come from vernacular medium backgrounds. During my lecture in college, at the beginning of the academic year, I found two students sitting on one of the last benches away from the rest of the class. On inquiring about the reason, one of them stood up nervously and whispered a few words. I could barely hear him. The others promptly replied, ``Ma'am, they are from Marathi medium,'' and the whole class burst out laughing. That was the last thing I expected. I was disgusted, shocked, angry, ashamed and at the same time filled with pity, not for those two students but for the rest of the class. By the end of the academic year I helped them get over their vernacular medium complex.Lately I heard of a boy in our neighbourhood who had attempted suicide. This boy, whom I know since he was a kid, was a very intelligent and smart child. His over-ambitious parents wanted him to fulfill all their unfulfilled ambitions and wishes. They even compared the boy with his sister (who was much brighter than him probably?) developing in him the sibling complex.So you see, how we knowingly or unknowingly keep showering this gift on our loved ones (or not-so-loved ones?). What the victim needs is guidance, patience, empathy (not sympathy) and understanding. Stop showing your care and concern in a rude way. Many a time this seed of inferiority complex, that is embedded in the young mind, plays havoc leading to disastrous or not-so-disastrous results (if they are lucky enough to get a saviour at the right time).Help him better his self-image. A weak self-image is not a natural state of mind. We weren't born with it. We acquired it as we went along. So, show your concern by lending him an ear and helping him cope with life. Not everyone needs a psychiatrist or a psychologist. What a youngster needs is a true friend, not a doctor's prescription. Gift him your friendship.
