Hypocrisy could well be our middle name if not the first one. We speak big but think small. We say something but mean just the opposite. We quote from the scriptures but don’t grasp even the basics of civilised interaction. We talk of freedom but taboos mark everything we do — unwritten dos and don’ts hover around us like ghosts.One instance after another proves this hypocrisy. In a progressive metropolis like Mumbai, a young lady had to fake a marriage in order to live with her partner in a rented apartment. Her “folly” cost her a beauty title!The lady’s dilemma is nothing new. A single woman or man looking for a roof over their heads may have to subject themselves to the ignominious scrutiny of assorted landlords/landladies on their sexual proclivities and social lives.It’s shocking that in today’s day and age, these puritanical notions are still the norm. A “respectably” married couple is always preferred to a singleton. It doesn’t matter if the two have cat fights and scream at each other until they are blue in the face. The important thing is that they are married. The singleton, in contrast, has to be careful even while interacting with the mosquitoes and flies around!Strange notions about singletons remain afloat. Just the other day, one socialite I knew whispered something to another about a certain well-known bachelor: the burden of her conversation was this — why was the man unmarried, even though he appeared to be over fifty, was he gay, or something? The object of their conversation overheard the comment and actually felt compelled to mumble out a few words of explanation!It’s baffling, this diet of marriage upon which we all seem to subsist. So fundamentalist is the thinking that even those in bad marriages carry on with their stormy relationships. Those considering a parting of ways think a hundred times before filing for a divorce. Opting out of marriage is still considered a major sin.As marriage counsellors have confirmed, staying in a bad marriage has serious health consequences. Yet those who dare to part ways have to steel themselves to come up with a convincing explanation of why they chose to do what they did. It appears that until our thinking vis-a-vis marriage undergoes a total overhaul, we will remain entrapped in these regressive attitudes.Singletons then continue to be the simpletons of society, who actually believe they can lead their lives on their own terms. They deserve our support and sympathy. Indeed, by extending it to them and accepting them as they are, we ourselves emerge as more enlightened individuals.
